


Shirts and Skins

by PetalsToFish



Series: Canon Compliant Jily [13]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Kissing in the Rain, Love Confessions, Lust at First Sight, Mild cussing, Rain, Rating: M, Suggestive Themes, Wearing His Clothes, early relationships, rewrite and repost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 09:34:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28686426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PetalsToFish/pseuds/PetalsToFish
Summary: It wasn't the first time Lily wore James’ shirt and it certainly wouldn't be the last....(2021 version rewritten from original 2016 version)
Relationships: James Potter & Lily Evans Potter, James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, James/Lily, Jily - Relationship
Series: Canon Compliant Jily [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2199819
Comments: 27
Kudos: 149





	Shirts and Skins

The first time Lily wore her friend James’ shirt was an accident.

Lily grabbed it from the laundry pile that she’d gotten from the communal laundry room in the hall, like she always did. She threw the scarlet shirt over her head and as it slid down her face into place, she realized how good the shirt smelled. Normally, when Lily’s clothes came back from the dryers they didn’t smell like the body wash her grandfather used.

When the hem fell right above her knees like a very short dress, Lily came to the conclusion that the shirt was definitely not her own. The soft cotton was well worn but soft against her bare skin. Colored scarlet with a lion rearing on the front majestically, it looked almost exactly like her shirt that was undoubtedly smaller. Lily pulled the shirt off just as quickly as she'd put it on, checking the tag and seeing no name written in. When she flipped it over to view the back she was in luck.

Lily knew exactly where to find the shirt's owner. The letters engraved in gold on the back spelled out the word ‘captain’ in all capital letters. The gold glowed in the dim light from the oil lights as Lily folded it back up. How the football captain's shirt got into her pile, she had no idea but he was probably going to look for it sooner rather than later.

Lily lifted the collar to her nose and sniffed. She'd have to ask James what aftershave he used because it smelled just like her grandfather. She didn’t know if he’d find that fact funny or humiliating. Lily supposed that she shouldn’t tell her friend that he smelled like an eighty year old man who eats too many cinnamon candies. 

Lily grabbed the shirt once she was done changing with full intention to give it back to its owner. One of the perks of being Head Girl for her boarding school was having her own room for her last year. Lily's room was still in the hall with all her friends, but instead of having to share a room in the girls dormitory, she was alone. Her door was conveniently located at the end of the hall and that's where James' private dorm was also located. 

Lily left her room just in time. The Head Boy emerged clad in the school uniform with a football bag flung over one shoulder. James' messy black hair was a hurricane on his head. The long black strands stuck up and around the glasses he often wore. The lanky seventeen-year-old closed his door and turned to leave the hall.

"James!" Lily called his name and he faltered as he turned himself around at the sound of her voice.

"Alright?" He asked kindly and Lily didn't miss the way his eyes gouged her playfully from the toes up.

They'd been having a lot of problems staring at each other recently. Lily herself acknowledged how handsome that he looked with his sleeves rolled up to his elbow and his hair wildly out of control like he'd already been running across a field. James' own eyes were calculating when she met them, like he was in calculus class and he was trying to figure out a complex formula.

"I’m fine." She answered noncommittally, "football practice?"

She already knew the answer was yes. James spent every Sunday working with his second string teammates at the fields. James was the type of person who never did anything halfway. He was a star student, an amazing football player, and an even better Head student than Lily. 

“I promised Jessie Mills that I’d work on his defense moves.” James nodded and then pointed at her outfit, "Going to town? You look nice."

"Not until later.” Lily flattened her palms over her jeans and shook her head, “the girls and I are going to Mulligans.”

She didn't miss the spark of mischief in his eyes when he said, "I hope I see you there.”

She wished that she had enough self-respect to not blush whenever he complimented her in his offhandedly way but her cheeks flushed either way. Lily stepped all the way out of the doorway. Moving towards him was always a gamble because James had no personal bubble and he always took advantage when she got close enough. To protect herself, Lily held the shirt up between their bodies with a half smile.

"There was a mix up in the laundry room." She offered when he took the shirt from her with a quizzical look.

James lifted the shirt to her like he was toasting her find. "Cheers."

Then, his eyes traveled over her once more before he left her standing in front of her doorway alone. Lily went about her Sunday with no changes. She spent a few hours planning out her French Revolution essay, also known as gossiping with her friend Mary while blank sheets of paper sat in front of them. She broke up a nasty fight in the hallway around three in the afternoon. At five, Lily had dinner in the dining hall with her friends. James wasn’t there or at Mulligans later that night so Lily didn't think anything else of him until Monday night.

Lily was running late to her patrolling detail thanks to Shelly Mathis chatting her ear off at dinner. Lily ran so fast up the steps of the main staircase that by the time she rounded the stairs to the third floor hallway she was completely out of breath, her hair was disheveled, and her school skirt had risen two inches higher on her waist.

James was waiting for her, seeing as he was her assigned partner that night. He was leaning casually against the nearest wall and his hazel eyes took in her disheveled look with quaint amusement. When James' eyes dropped to her long legs, his hands reached for his hair. Lily stopped halfway to him, positively stunned at how a boy could look so positively full of trouble and yet so innocent at the same time. Lily took her time walking over to him, tugging her skirt back down. Her heart was still pounding as she apologized profusely to him for being late. James didn't say anything about her tardiness and instead pushed himself up and off the wall so that he could straighten her tie. His hands weren't shy as he brushed her tie from her shoulders so it fell against her chest. Next he used his hands to try and flatten her hair back into the wild bun atop her head.

That was enough, Lily furiously pushed his hands away. "James, it's fine. I'll just be going to bed after this."

James smiled at her annoyed response and wrinkled his nose, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Fine, but don't _ever_ complain to me about my hair."

Lily eyed his extremely messy black tresses with scorn. “I’m still not convinced you own a hairbrush.” 

When they were younger, she used to tease him terribly about not owning a hairbrush because his hair always stuck up in every direction. Now, almost adults, Lily didn't want to do anything more than run her own fingers through his hair for him.

Not that she'd ever tell him that, of course, because he'd let her. She had learned enough about James to know she could fall down _that_ rabbit hole without even blinking. As far as Lily's hormones were concerned, James was better than hot tea on a rainy day. As far as Lily's head was concerned, James was best to be kept far away from her raging hormones.

James started walking away and motioned for her to follow, "let’s get this over with, yeah?"

Even though she rolled her eyes, her smile didn't quite leave her face.

"Are you ready for snogging?"

James pulled a rubber band ball from his pocket and started to toss it up in the air and catch it as it fell back down. Lily kept her eyes on the little ball, always marveling at how such a lanky boy like James could be so coordinated and never drop the ball on the floor. She waited until he caught the ball again before answering him.

"Am I snogging you?"

He laughed at her joke and threw the ball in the air again, catching it with ease despite twirling to wink at her once.

"Clever."

She smirked at his approval but kept her tone light as she replied openly. "Monday nights are not a heavy snogging night. We should have a pretty easy patrol."

“Good,” James said, “because I’m not in the mood for a snog tonight.”

“Shame.” Lily muttered under her breath as they turned the hallway. 

They'd gotten assigned the best shift as far as Lily was concerned. James led the way into the trophy room, still throwing and catching his ball. Lily had a bag with parchment in it so she could start on her science essay. James fell to the floor and Lily sat down next to him, leaning her back against the case he'd sat under. James began bouncing his ball across the ground so that it'd hit the opposite case and come bouncing back to him. The sound of the ball bouncing back and forth didn't bother Lily as she worked on her paper; in fact the sound was soothing. She’d always hated the dead quiet.

All in all, it was a normal Monday night.

Monday nights, funnily enough, were Lily's favorites. James didn't expect anything from her and vice versa. They simply enjoyed each other's company and watched for trouble. Sometimes James would bring playing cards and they'd play games of go fish until midnight. Sometimes they walked the length of the school grounds and James walked directly next to her, entertaining her with stories of his youth. 

And sometimes Lily felt like they were becoming something more than friends.

James knew things about Lily that she didn't share with many. He knew that she had trouble at home with her sister and sick mother. He knew that she was trying to get a job so she could take care of herself once she got out of school. He knew so many secrets that sometimes she wondered if maybe she told him too much, but James was so easy to talk to. Even now, with the crystal trophy cases glimmering in the moonlight and his ball bouncing across the room, Lily was talking.

"How was practice yesterday?"

"Fine." James said, placing the rubber band ball between them and placing his head against the wooden cabinets behind them, "Cody Simpleton scored his first goal, I got hit by a foul ball in the back and I think Anthony Hopkins is an idiot."

Lily leaned her head against the cabinets to mirror James' position. She turned her cheek so she could look at James. He was staring at the glass windows and the moon that shimmered outside. It was a half moon and was very beautiful. The only light in the trophy room came from the cases themselves, so James was bathed in a golden light, and Lily thought he was so handsome.

"Cody was so excited in class this morning, telling all his mates he made a goal." Lily commented, trying to keep her mind off James' looks.

Suddenly, James turned his head so he was facing her. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment. He got under her skin like no one else. It was like whenever she was near James, she was fighting a war just to keep her hands to herself. James cleared his throat and adjusted so his back was flatter against the cabinet.

"So, is your foul ball back pain related to why Anthony Hopkins an idiot?"

She really should've just gone back to the essay.

"He fancies himself a ladies man." James crossed one leg over the other in agitation.

Lily lifted her head and looked at James, "What?"

Anthony Hopkins was anything but a ladies man. The number of times Lily had found the football player getting told off by girls for being an absolute prick was uncountable. He liked to fuck multiple women and kept a tally in his belt. Lily didn't quite despise Anthony, but she definitely avoided him in the hallways.

James pushed his glasses up his face, "He spent the entire practice talking about how he was going to get this one girl to go to Mulligan’s with him and when I told him to stuff it, he kicked the ball at me and then told me it was an accident."

"Why do you care who Anthony Hopkin's tries to take to Mulligans?" Lily snorted, "don't you have better things to worry about?"

James unfolded his hands from behind his head. "Well normally, I _wouldn't_ care." He nudged her foot carefully with his ankle. "But this was different."

Lily realized James meant that Anthony Hopkins had been planning to ask her to Mulligans. "Oh." 

James brushed aside her surprised tone. "I broke my spine for you Lily, never forget it."

James leaned off the cabinet and turned his back to her, lifting up his shirt to show a giant blue and purple bruise on the lower half of his back. Immediately Lily placed her hand on his shoulder and he tensed under her touch. His skin burned against her cool fingertips and Lily bit her lip.

"Ouch." 

"Anthony Hopkins has a wicked aim." James said once she moved her hand away, "It's the only reason I didn't bury him on that field."

“I am so sorry.” Lily's fingertips brushed against the bruise and James shifted under her touch.

Lily's eyes flickered up to his head for a moment. She couldn't see his expression since he was faced away from her and she figured that not being able to look into his eyes was a saving grace. Lily was careful to lower his shirt back down without touching the bruise again. He sighed and fell back against the case beside her, smiling at her like she was the moon.

"I think I get major friend points for stopping Anthony from asking you out.”

“You get ten thousand points.” 

“When do I cash those in for a trip to Mulligans?”

He leaned closer and she knew what he wanted. It was the same thing she'd been wanting and that's what scared Lily the most. She dropped her head and stared at her lap. James pulled away abruptly and sighed, throwing his hands behind his head, trying to act as if her rejection hadn't hurt him.

Her rejection hurt her the most, she supposed.

"Lily?"

Lily turned her head to look at him quizzically. James looked worried and he was staring at his fingers instead of her. Lily's fingers flexed at her side, wanting to reach out for him.

"What?" she finally asked.

She could feel her ears heat up under the pressure of his serious tone, "I like spending time with you."

He captured her attention with those words and she felt her heart start to pound in her chest. He knew what he was doing, James was not as nervous as her, in fact he was ready to jump all in. Lily was afraid once she jumped in that she wouldn't be able to jump back out because she'd never want to. She was so afraid of losing him that she never liked to consider that she was losing a chunk of herself when she avoided her feelings.

"I like it too, James." She told him truthfully.

The way his face lit up Lily would've thought someone had handed him all the gold in the world. James settled down right next to her and they remained quiet the rest of the night, caught up in their own thoughts. 

It was probably the rainiest week on record in Northern England. The rain was cold and came down in sheets. The fountains in the square were overflowing into the paved roads. Outdoor classes were cancelled and sports were moved indoors. Lily's only outdoor class was her morning yoga class and she was relieved when they were told to meet at a classroom...until the rainstorm prompted crazy Yogi Yolanda to take her students for a walk in the rain to ‘wash away’ their stress. 

James' best friend, Sirius, took the yoga class with Lily. Sirius had a very witty attitude that Lily found amusing, so she often hung around him in class just for laughs. Naturally, with the heavy rain, came unhappy students, and Sirius was one of those many unhappy students. In fact, Sirius was livid.

"What fucking crazy person tries to give her students hypothermia?" Sirius complained loudly as they raced for the dormitory steps, where it was a mad run for the hot showers. 

"I—I—don't know…" Lily's teeth chattered as she followed Sirius up the main staircase, “but I’m thinking of skipping class on Thursday if this rain keeps up!”

Sirius was undoing the bun atop his head, letting his shoulder length hair fall from confinement. Sirius shook his head out like a dog after a bath and Lily scowled when water droplets hit her in the face. Sirius grinned sheepishly when he looked back and saw her annoyed look.

"Sorry, Lily." He apologized without much empathy.

"It's fine," she grumbled, squeezing out her robes, "it's not like I'm _not_ already soaked to the bone."

They made it into the common halls where everyone dry worked hard to avoid the students trampling in looking like they'd walked through a monsoon. Sirius acknowledged Lily for her company before disappearing down the stairs. Lily walked over to her door and swung it open with desperation.

The first thing she did was rip off her drenched sweatshirt, throwing it to her floor in protest. Lily was just starting to take off her leggings when she was interrupted from her wet sulking. Her door swung open behind her and Lily awkwardly pulled the wet black material up quickly.

"What the hell?" She demanded.

" _Light of my life_!"

Even though she was soaked to the bone, even though her fingers were numb, and even though she wanted to scream…she still managed to feel a little warmth in the pit of her stomach as she turned towards James’ elated voice. James paused in his declaration, looking her up and down. Lily was still shivering, her red hair dripping and pooling into puddles at her feet.

"Did you go swimming?" He joked, eyeing her soaked upper half thankfully, "you forgot to invite me."

Lily crossed her arms over her bra and glared at him, "make it fast James, my goosebumps have goosebumps."

Then, without any warning (not even a " _here comes my shirt_ ") James reached up and pulled his shirt off. Lily's jaw dropped as he tossed the red shirt over her head. The warm fabric covered Lily's damp skin and she was engulfed in his smell again. It was the third time she had his shirt in her grasp in a week and it was destroying her complex.

She closed her eyes, savoring the moment before she pulled the shirt down over herself and glared at him. He was laughing at her expression as he straightened his white undershirt back over his bare chest, not even concerned.

"Why did you barge into my room?" She wasn't about to let him get away with anything, especially not while wrapped up in his clothes.

"Listen," James said, "I'm gonna need you to halt on the blankets and hot chocolate party."

"More like a hot shower." Lily mumbled, thinking of her private bathroom where James could _not_ enter. Lily wound her hair up at the nape of her neck and squeezed it so more water dripped onto her floor. 

James explained his remarkably impeccable timing. "Some arse put milk in Savannah Long's tea and now she's in the infirmary throwing up buckets." James continued, pointedly ignoring her shower comment. "So, keep my shirt on, follow me, and get ready for all night rounds Head Girl."

Lily moaned before she grumpily followed James out of her warm room into the drafty commons. She had never wanted to give up her special position until that very moment. A few students turned to stare at them when they passed the general hang out area. Everyone else was gathered around the communal television and watching a popular band play a set of their top hits live. 

"James, _why_?" She lamented as the door closed behind them.

Lily might've had his dry shirt on but her leggings were still soaked and her shoes squeaked from the amount of water that leaked into them. Lily struggled to squeeze the rest of the water from her red hair. She was certain that she would never be warm again. 

"Because Long cheated on Michael Amoco and I'm _pretty_ sure he poisoned her." James sniggered as she stomped into step with him.

Lily forgot about her wet leggings momentarily to gasp at James. "Someone finally told Michael about Savannah kissing George?"

" _Savannah_ told Michael." James treated Lily to the school gossip, "What were you doing in French that you didn't see the weepy scene happening on the side?"

Lily bit her lip and playfully stepped away from James while singing, "nothing."

He caught her aversion and he pointed his finger at her. "Ah, you're hiding something!" He called her out.

Lily sealed her lips and he snorted, reaching out to push her away. Lily laughed as she covered face to hide her blush. Lily would never admit that the reason she'd not noticed the drama between Long and Avoco was because she'd been too busy staring at James. He'd been doodling on his paper all class; she just didn't get to see what he'd drawn. Lily pulled her hands from her face to see he was staring down at her with a positively endearing look.

"You're a liar, Lily."

"I didn't say anything!" She argued.

"You didn't have too." He rolled his eyes, "I've known you since we were kids."

Lily countered his rolling of the eyes with an eye roll of her own. Their footsteps were in sync as they made their way from the dormitory to wherever Savannah Long had been assigned to patrol. Lily squeezed water from her leggings as they walked, ignoring the fact that James' shirt pretty much covered everything to begin with. She would much rather be back in her room in a warm shower. 

"So what’s the student patrol like on Wednesdays?"

James sighed ominously. "Well, we should start at the greenhouse, I hear kids have been sneaking in for smokes."

"No!" Lily felt like crying as soon as he said the word _greenhouse_. "I have to go back outside?"

"Yes." He did look apologetic once he realized her discomfort. "That's why I didn't bother having you change."

"Jaaammmesssss." She stopped walking and leaned against the wall in protest.

He laughed at her childish practice and turned, shoving his hands into his pockets. He shook his head at her, like she was the funniest thing he'd ever seen. She couldn't believe it, half dry and about to be soaked by the awful weather for a second time that day. 

"I know," he understood, "it’s shitty, but I can assure you that I have no plans to walk outside the entire time. We'll patrol the insides. No one in their right mind would be outside on a night like this anyways."

James was at least right about that. Once they came upon the door that led outside to the greenhouses and Lily opened it, it was clear that the rain hadn't even slowed down. The rain sloshed into the hallway and Lily sent James an annoyed face. He laughed at her and tugged at a strand of her hair. 

"Don't be mad at _me_ , be mad at Savannah Long."

James grabbed her hand and took off for the first greenhouse door they came upon. With a clever yank on the door handle, James threw Lily inside the dark and humid glass house. Even though she'd only been in the rain for twenty seconds at most, raindrops had still pierced through James' shirt and her knees were soaking wet again. James shook out beside her and then grabbed an umbrella from the back of one of the chairs. The rain had flattened his hair against his forehead and covered his glasses. 

Lily stood there shivering in the darkness of the greenhouse classroom but she laughed as James waved the umbrella between them. 

“We could’ve used that five seconds ago.”

“We need one for the trip back.”

“I don’t think I can get any wetter.”

“That’s what she said-- _ow_!” James complained when Lily smacked him on the back of his head with a flick of her wrist. 

Lily looked around the dark and musty classroom. Random assorted pots were thrown all over and plants with long tentacles stretched for them from the ceiling. James flipped the light switch to brighten up their walk as they left the classroom and entered the forest of the greenhouse. Students were raising a collection of hestia; pretty white flowers with yellow middles. Lily let her fingers slide along the flowers resting next to the glass panes. The building was all glass and normally Lily thought it was pretty. That night, with the wind coming down in sheets, nothing could be seen through the glass walls except black rain.

“I don’t even think the umbrella will save us.” James muttered as he looked out on the black rain too, “let’s wait it out.”

Lily fell onto an overturned pot dramatically, “we’ll be sleeping here all night.”

“Think positively.” 

“We’ll be sleeping here together all night.” 

“That’s better.”

Lily mocked him and James laughed as he settled on the ground between her legs. He leaned up against the overturned pot she sat on and pulled his phone out. Lily watched him check several of his apps until he got to snapchat. He flicked on the facing camera and Lily automatically posed behind him. 

James typed: _stuck in the greenhouses with @lilbean because it's raining cats and dogs_

They both played games on his phone to waste time while rain splattered against the glass ceiling. Slowly, Lily slid from the overturned pot to the tiled floor next to James. She extended her feet out under her and looked over to see that James was staring at her with an off expression.

"What?" 

He swallowed and scratched his chin. "We're close right?"

Lily just stared at him. James licked his lips and turned his body to face Lily. Lily didn't quite know what to do when he slid into her space so readily. She kept her hands down, fingers gripping his shirt tightly. James' hazel eyes were hard to look away from. Lily thought she saw a flicker of worry in his eyes when she tugged at his shirt on her body.

"Can I say something crazy?" He asked. 

"You normally do anyway." She tried to be casual, unreadable, but James saw right through her façade.

"I'm about to be romantic so hold onto your bloody pride for a second, would you?"

" _Fucking hell, James_."

Instead of being offended by her blatant slip of the word James just cackled and grabbed her hand. She stared at the way her fingers slipped so readily through his. Like it was easy. Like it was simple. God, she wanted it to be that simple. 

"I've got to be honest." He continued his conversation when she didn’t run away. "When you switched up our clothes, I spent the entire practice imagining what you'd look like in one of my shirts."

"Sorry to disappoint." She nodded down to the shirt she was wearing. 

Her self-deprecating tone only made him lean in closer, his long nose an inch from her cheek. "Ah, Lil? Newsflash? You look way hotter than I even imagined."

"We can't do anything crazy, James." Her voice cracked. "We're supposed to be working."

James eyed her peculiarly. "But you aren't fully opposed to kissing me when we’re done, right?"

Lily kept her eyes on the hestia plants. "I'm not _fully opposed_ to anything."

"Wait." James squeezed her hand. "You aren't opposed to anything?"

" _Fully_?" Lily glanced at him, wondering where on earth he was going with his wicked little smirk and wandering hands.

"So, if I were to say, snog you tomorrow," he calculated with a precise look, "you wouldn't _fully_ oppose it?"

"Ah-" He put a finger on her mouth to stop her from speaking.

"Shhh," he whispered blissfully, "don't answer that."

"Do you want me to answer or not?" She muttered against his finger before he pulled it away excitedly. 

“No opposition?” He determined. 

She glared at him with all her might. "You wouldn't do it anyways."

James arched an eyebrow at her. "You don't think I'd kiss you?"

Lily crossed her arms. "No." She said stubbornly. "You wouldn't kiss me because you'd be afraid."

"Afraid of what?" James scoffed.

Lily's chest felt like it would cave in under the pressure of his stare. "Afraid of what would happen."

James lost his smile and frowned. "That's the pot calling the kettle black."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily huffed.

James pushed his glasses up his nose. "Obviously that if there's anyone in this entire fucking school _afraid_ of what would happen if we stepped over our lines of friendship, it's you." He waved his hand at her. "I've never been anything but honest about how I feel with you."

Lily opened and closed her mouth twice before answering with hurt in her voice. "I'm not pushing you away."

James rolled his eyes and stood up. "Yeah, sure Lily."

“Well,” she sputtered, “you’re just as pushy!”

James cracked his neck, “I’m not pushing you away.”

“No,” Lily flushed, “not that kind of pushy.”

Lily watched as he walked over to the hestia and examined one of the pots beside it. She was not pushing him away. Everything about James drew her in like a wave gets pulled to the shore. If anything, _he_ was the one pushing. Only he was pushing her closer and closer into his arms.

Lily sighed in defeat and stood up, brushing off James' shirt. Lily went to go stand next to James over the flowers, pointedly keeping herself a good distance away from him. It didn’t matter, even trying, because her pinky slid against his until he grabbed her hand again.

"Listen, James." She murmured, "clearly I’ve still got some issues to work out but it’s only because I don’t want to lose you as a friend if this were to...blow up in our faces."

James ripped his hand from hers and snapped, "Lily, my only issue is how badly I have it for you."

Lily froze, one hand on the flowers, head tilted sideways at him. James' left hand lifted to his hair when he turned his head and found her just standing there staring at him stupidly. He suddenly looked sheepish, like he hadn't meant to say exactly that. James' eyes, almost black in the dark, traced her body from her toes up.

"Nothing to say to that?" He commented, almost breathlessly.

Lily answered truthfully, "I don't know."

James shook his head and leaned against the table holding the flowers. He continued staring at Lily. She fiddled with the edges of his shirt and stared at the ground. She had no idea how to tell him exactly how she felt. Lily couldn't explain how much she had come to need James around for her own selfish reasons. It wasn’t easy to fancy someone like James, who everyone watched when he walked past because he stood on such a high pedestal. All she knew was that she didn’t ever want to go far from wherever he ended up. 

"Okay." James muttered, almost sounding frustrated as he turned his back away from her. "Alright."

"James." Lily begged. "Don't be mad, you just caught me off guard."

James' shoulders dropped and he shot a look over his shoulder. "I'm not mad, I just wish you'd stop questioning what you see in me.”

James was the kindest, funniest, best guy she'd ever known. She wasn't at all questioning what she saw in him, she was questioning what James saw in her. What was so special about the girl from Cokeworth? What made James literally spend half his time at her side, proudly adoring her? Lily was afraid. What would happen when they finally broke through the glass wall that had been between them for years? What would she do if James woke up and realized Lily was nobody special. She was the daughter of two accountants. She was outwardly clever but secretly insecure about her skills, her life and her friends.

James didn't pester her anymore about feelings. In fact, he didn't pester her at all as they finished their rounds and headed back to the common hall. The common hall was silent and empty at one in the morning. James was slightly ahead of her, keeping his thoughts to himself and she hated it. Normally he was an open book but now he was keeping himself shut off. They'd come so far as friends and she knew that he wanted more.

She did too.

Lily stopped James by grabbing his wrist. James stood still, placing a hand on the door to his room for some support. James looked over his shoulder warily. When their eyes met, for a minute, Lily was able to think clearly. James' glasses were sliding down his nose as he examined her like she was a bomb about to go off. 

"I'm not questioning what I see in you." She said, capturing his attention enough that he fully turned to face her. "I'm questioning what you see in me."

James' stone cold face shifted and became warm and comforting. "Have I ever given you a reason to question how I feel about you?"

"No but—"

"This ought to be good."

"What if you get sick of me?"

"I've never heard anything more ridiculous."

"Savannah Long got sick of Michael Amoco."

James rolled his eyes at her. "Don't even try to compare what we have to those idiots." Then he stammered. "Wait, are you afraid that you'd get sick of _me_?"

Lily furrowed her brows together at him angrily. "Of course not!"

James half laughed, half moaned. "Then why are you making this so difficult?"

"I'm making it difficult?" She asked, puzzled.

James' eyes went a bit hazy. "Lily. You don't even know." He shook his finger at her, "The past few months I've had to deal with your continual stares in the classroom. I've had to hold my breath anytime you get closer than you are now because you smell like literal fresh baked biscuits--don't laugh its true! I've avoided Mulligans for months so that I wouldn't get jealous if you went out with any other bloke. I've had to tell myself not to kiss you when you do or say anything remotely sexy."

"Sorry." She tilted her head. “Me? Sexy?”

“Look at you!” James gestured at her whole body. "I'm barely functioning!"

"The feelings are quite mutual." She muttered nonsensically.

He actually laughed at that one, a real laugh that she felt down to her toes. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and she smiled, a usual reaction to his laughter. She was surprised when James placed two hands on her shoulders, forcing her to look up at him. His eyes were soft again and she felt herself relaxing under his adoring smile.

"And Lily." He whistled softly. "Nothing has ever driven me quite as mad, as seeing you wear my shirt all night."

Lily saw the look in his eyes, the same one she'd been avoiding all year. In that moment, Lily decided not to ignore his looks anymore. Lily leaned up on her tiptoes and surprised James when she pressed her lips against his. It took all of three seconds for James to respond by pushing her back against his door and returning her kiss with a playful nip to her lower lip. His kissing was persistent and rushed, likely all the pent up energy he'd been holding back.

Lily loved everything about it.

She leaned into the back of the door, meeting his kisses with a pathetic attempt to slow them down. James' hands were in her hair, on her waist, all over her body really. It did no good, Lily decided, avoiding James for so long. Kissing him was like pulling the trigger of a gun and it set her off. Her hands were tangled in his clothes and his glasses were pushing into her skin.

He broke away and she stared at him in wonder. His hands kept tracing up and down her arms. She didn’t know if the goosebumps were from being frozen or his persistent touch. She kissed James again, while wearing his shirt, after running around in the rain all day. She giggled against his mouth and that made him nuzzle her playfully with his nose.

"What?" 

"I’m totally going to get pneumonia.” She tossed her arms around his neck. “I’m _freezing_.”

“I can help you warm up.” 

She laughed and he took that as a _go_ , swallowing her laughter with another kiss that led into another kiss. Eventually, Lily so wound up in James that she felt lightheaded. When they finally broke apart, Lily's hair was pulled to one side of her neck and James' black hair had a mind of its own. Lily licked her lips and stayed leaning against the door, just smiling at James.

He smiled down at her too, looking mighty proud of himself. "I'd better be getting to bed." He murmured, pausing only to run a finger across her cheek. "Before I can't leave you standing out here looking lovelier than anything in my shirt."

“I can give the shirt back, if it’s that big a bother.” She teased and reached to take the shirt off but James stopped her hands and tightened the shirt around her hips with a stern look.

"You know what? Keep it." He told her. "The look suits you."

It wasn't the first time Lily wore James’ shirt and it certainly wouldn't be the last.


End file.
